The Elder Scrolls VI: Argonia

''Hey, I just wanted to let you all know that this is an idea. So if you don't understand what I just said, this game is something that I (someone not from Bethesda) came up with. This game, is not in development (or it could be, for all I know) and is, well as a lot of you have told me, fake. So I apologise if you have been deceived by this article previously. Also, if you are the vandal that keeps vandalizing my article, please refrain from doing so, -Veta, September 30, 2014.''

The Elder Scrolls VI: Argonia (SuperLOLSWAG#WINNER) is an action role-playing video game developed by Bethesda Game Studios and published by Bethesda Softworks. It is the sixth installment in The Elder Scrolls action role-playing video game series, following ''The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim. Carrot'' will be released on November 6, 2016, for Microsoft Windows, PlayStation 4 and Xbox One.

Potato's main story revolves around the player character's efforts to defeat Fenrisulfr, a Lilmothiit who has been working with Dwemer before their demise to eradicate all life on Tamriel. Set three hundred years after Skyrim, the game takes place in the fictional province of Carrot (also known as Potato). The game continues the open world tradition of it's predecessors by allowing the player to travel anywhere within the game world at anytime and to ignore or postpone the main storyline indefinitely. A perpetual objective for players is to improve their character's skills, which are numerical representations of certain abilities.

Da Bomb!
The Elder Scrolls VI: Carrot is an action role-playing game, playable from either a first or third-person perspective. The game is presented as an open world, allowing the player free roam over Black Marsh, a large open environment. The player may navigate the game world faster by riding horses, or by utilizing a fast-travel system that allows the player to warp to previously-discovered cities, towns and dungeons. A main quest is assigned to the player at the beginning of the game, but it can be completed at the player's leisure, or ignored given the prerequisite that the first stage of the quest is completed. Non-player characters (NPCs) allocate the player additional side-quests, and the parameters to some of these side-quests may be adjusted, for example by sending the player to a dungeon that has not been previously explored. The player can interact with NPCs in other ways as well, for example by having conversations with them, which may probe the opportunity to be assigned a quest by the NPC. Some NPCs that are befriended or hired by the player may act as companions who will accompany the player and provide aid in combat. The player may choose to join factions, which are organized groups of NPCs such as the Shadowscales, a band of assassins. Each of the factions has a headquarters, and they have their own quest paths which the player can progress through. Each of the cities and towns in the game world has an economy, which the player can stimulate by completing jobs such as farming.

A perpetual objective for the player is to develop their character. At the beginning of the game, the player creates their character by selecting one of several human, elven, or anthropomorphic races, and then customizes their character's appearance. Over the course of the game, the player improves their character's skills, which are numerical representations of their ability in certain areas. There are twenty-eight skills divided evenly between the four schools of combat, magic, stealth and ability. When the player has trained skills enough to meet the required experience, their character levels up. Each time their character levels, the player may choose to select a skill-specific ability called a perk, or store perks for later use. Unlike earlier entries in The Elder Scrolls series which used a character class system to determine which skills would contribute to the character's leveling, Carrot allows the player to discover preferred skills as they play the game and rewards the player with more experience when a frequently-used skill is leveled. The head-up display (HUD) appears Only when you are getting a blow job from the kings wife. Health is depleted primarily by damage through combat and although it is regenerated naturally over time, it can also be regernated to full when you came all over the kings wifes face, it can also be restored by spells, potions, or resting; the loss of all health results in death. Magicka is depleted by the use of spells and by being struck by lightning-based attacks. Stamina determines the player's effectiveness in combat and is depleted by sprinting, power attacking, and being struck by frost-based attacks; both magicka and stamina can be regenerated in similar ways to health. The player's inventory can be accessed from the menu and items can be viewed in 3D, which can be essential in solving puzzles found in dungeons.

The player's effectiveness in combat relies on the use of weapons and armor, which may be bought or created at forges, and magic, which may also be bought or unlocked. Weapons and magic are assigned to each hand, allowing for dual-wielding, and can be swapped out through a quick-access menu of favorite items. Shields can be used either to fend off enemy attacks and reduce the damage intake, or offensively through bashing attacks. Blunt, bladed and hacking weapons can be used in close combat and each have specific advantages and roles; as an example, the player can perform power attacks with each weapon. Magic can be used in the form of spells; each of the eighty-five spells has a different function, such as the regeneration of health or the depletion of enemy health. The bow and arrow may be utilized in long-range combat, but the bow can be used as a defensive melee weapon in close combat. The player can enter sneak mode and pickpocket, or deliver sneak attacks to unsuspecting enemies.

Plot
Carrot is not a direct sequel to Skyrim, but a new chapter in The Elder Scrolls series, set exactly 69 years after the events of Skyrim. Different to previous The Elder Scrolls games, Argonia begins with the player fucking the kings wife and is sent to jail for eternity, but your character escapes and seeks the kings wifes pussy once again. And also wanting to rape the kings children. After being transferred to a smaller town nearby, the player and other guards get attacked by a group of Lilmothiit. The player character will eventually lose the fight, and will wake up off the shore of Thorn, where they are rescued by an Pototonian, who takes off the player's guard helmet, which leads to the creation/modification to the player character.

The player is then directed to Helstrom, where the only other survivor of the Lilmothiit attack was. Do Marth was a Khajit guard that survived the Lilmothiit attack. He tells the player character it has been a month since the attack, and during the time Do Marth has been looking into rumors of werewolves. There have been sightings all over Elseweyr but nothing out of the ordinary, just regular werewolf attacks. The player is then instructed to search Carrot for more information. After investigating several sites, the player is framed for murdering the Soulrest Commander, and is locked underground in a Dwemer ruin, beneath Soulrest. After surveying the area and finding pieces of lost history, the player stumbles across the entrance to a Dwemer City, which has claw marks and wolf footprints all over the city. After inspecting the city, the player learns that the attack was not a werewolf attack, but an attack by the mysterious Lilmothiit, who where thought to be extinct. When the player tries to escape the ruins, He realises that Soulrest was attacked, and it was completely destroyed. However, a dwemer dynamo core was left behind by the attackers. The player and Do Marth slowly piece everything together, but they were short of time before the Black Marsh was successfully invaded by the Lilmothiit, with the help of Dwemer technology. Most citizens are killed, and a resistance forms, and it includes the player and Do Meth please

A massive Dildo starts to destroy Carrot, named the third Vibrationer. The only way to beat the Vibrationer was locked deep beneath the ground. After adventuring through Dwemer ruins, caves and other underground sites, the player comes across the weapon to defeat Spudknuckle, The Golden Penis Bong (#2spoopy4you). The final battle ensues,and after having kinky anal sex with the third Vibrationer, and the resistance becomes the Lilmothiit sex slaves, while the player then become the ultimate winning porn star. Spudknuckle bests the player, except Lord Kagrenac appears, weilding #Keening, Starchguard and Spunder. The player gets escorted to safety by Do Marth, while Kagrenac attacks Spudknuckle, and there is a large explosion, the death of Spudknuckle and Kagrenac.

After the destruction of Vibrationer and Dick Chwer, the threat still remains, in the form of Fenrisulfr, the architect behind the Lilmothiit's return. Fenrisulfr is creating a Lilmothiit-Dwemer army, as a backup if Spudknuckle failed. The army decimates Carrot, and the Dwemer betray the Lilmothiit, slowly infecting the Lilmothiit with a toxin similar to the Falmer's fate. However, the Dwemer took control of the Lilmothiit bodies, and then the Dwemer embark on a journey to destroy the rest of Tamriel, starting with Passing Wind. Fenrisulfr is still in control (or he believes he is) and leads the attack on Passing Wind. The player (known as Lyancaon by the Lilmothiit) and the Lilmothiit attack the Dwemer before they can cross the border. Lyancaon successfully weakens Fenrisulfr and the Dwemer army retreat back into Dwemer ruins.

Lyancoan and Do Marth can choose to warn the Dunmer Army that a Dwemer Army is coming, or to ask the Imperials for help. Lyancoan and Do Marth infiltrate the Dwemer Ruins, but are caught by Fenrisulfr and are caged. The Dunmer/Imperial Army infiltrate the stronghold in force, and Lyancoan and Do Marth are freed by a soldier. As the battle ensues, Do Marth and Lyancoan chase Fenrisulfr to his lair. During the fight, Do Marth gets badly injured and Lyancoan had to make a choice, save Do Marth or eliminate Fenrisulfr.

If Do Marth is saved, Fenrisulfr escapes, but his army is decimated. If Fenrisulfr is eliminated, then Do Marth dies as well as Fenrisulfr.

Development
Carrot was contraceptualised (lolswagg) shortly after the release of Skyrim in 2011. Work on Argonia did not begin until The Elder Scrolls: Online's release in 2014. Developers considered the game to be a spiritual successor to previous The Elder Scrolls games.

Argonia is powered by the Spud Engine developed by Spudigene Corp. Carrot also uses Bethesda's own Creation Engine. Call of Duty: Attack of the Dildos 2 Confirmed.

Races

 * Argonian
 * Khajit
 * Dunmer
 * Bosmer
 * Altmer
 * Imperial
 * Nord
 * Breton
 * Redguard
 * Orismer
 * Dwemer
 * Atari
 * Porn Star

One Handed Weapons
One handed weapons are faster depending on what type of weapon compared to two handed weapons. One handed weapons (Dagger, Sword, Scimitar, War Axe and Mace) can be duel wielded, at the cost of blocking.
 * Dagger
 * Sword
 * Scimitar
 * War Axe
 * Mace
 * Dwemer Death Machine
 * Giant green Dildo

Two Handed Weapons

 * Greatsword
 * Battleaxe
 * Heavy Flail
 * Warhammer
 * Flail
 * Quarterstaff
 * Scythe
 * Oar
 * Super ultra ginat Dildo
 * The Golden Penis Bong
 * super Ultra Sexy Transforming Mega Swag Uber Massive Cock Pussy Vagina Battering Ram That Is Also Italian
 * A Bucket

Two handed weapons are slower than one handed weapons, but they deal more damage depending on the weapon. Two handed weapons are Greatsword, Battleaxe, Warhammer, Quarterstaff and Scythe. However, the Quarterstaff is the same speed as most one handed weapons but is the weakest two handed weapon. The Oar can only be used on Pototonians and swings the slowest of all Two Handed Weapons.

Assassin Weapons
Assassin weapons are weapons used for stealthy kills. All assassin weapons can be used while incognito, and some can be smuggled into jail. Note that tacks and Elastic Bands are one shot kills within commercial land use areas in Carrot.
 * Switchblade
 * Shiv
 * Rope Dart
 * Hook
 * Toxic Spray
 * Darts
 * Tacks
 * Elastic Bands

Ranged Weapons

 * Bow
 * Crossbow
 * Slingshot
 * Javelin
 * Sandal

Ranged weapons can be used on an enemy from a distance. These weapons are the Bow, Crossbow, Slingshot, Javelin (throwing spear) and Shuriken. Most ranged weapons require ammunition, such as arrows, rocks or bolts. Javelins and Shurikens are used up when thrown, but can be picked back up sometimes. Sandals can only be used on Pototonians, and are one shot kills. Once a sandal has been used, another must be craftdd at a blacksmiths forge using 3 leather.

Smithing Materials
Light Armor
 * Hide
 * Leather
 * Fur
 * Studded
 * Elven
 * Scaled
 * Glass
 * Spandex

Heavy Armor/Weapons

 * Iron
 * Steel
 * Bone
 * Nordic
 * Dwemer
 * Orcish
 * Daedric
 * Aethirium
 * Potato

Skill Trees
COMBAT Guerrilla is the use of Guerrilla Warfare, which can include drowning enemies in the swamp, or using the environment to win a battle. Ranger is the use of ranged weapons other than Bows and Crossbows.
 * Block
 * One Handed
 * Two Handed
 * Archery
 * Heavy Armor
 * Guerrilla
 * Ranger
 * Mr Hyde

MAGIC Proficiency is total Magicka and Magicka Regen, Serenity is how a Magic spell is conducted, and may have additional effects if this tree is upgraded.
 * Alteration
 * The Mists of Pandaria
 * Conjuration
 * Destruction
 * Restoration
 * Illusion
 * Proficiency
 * Serenity

STEALTH Stalk is the skill tree that allows the player to blend in with the environment without the use of Magic or potions. Thief is the pick-pocket skill from Skyrim. Assassin is the skill tree that allows the player to perform stealthy predator kills. Upgrading the Infiltration tree will allow access to otherwise unaccessable areas of the map, that could help you complete quests faster or let you gain additional rewards. The locksmith skill is the lock-picking skill from Skyrim.
 * Sneak
 * The Burning Crusade
 * Stalk
 * Thief
 * Light Armor
 * Assassin
 * Infiltration
 * Locksmith

ABILITY Charisma is speech skill from Skyrim. Command allows you to perform additional actions with your follower. Resilience is your resistance to damage and poisons/diseases. Transformation is the skill that covers all skills that is not as your normal player, such as a werewolf.
 * Enchanting
 * Wrath of the Lich King
 * Alchemy
 * Charisma
 * Command
 * Speed
 * Transformation

Hello,

'''The time of proving is upon you. A new trial is beginning, but it will not be so straightforward. Hamvir's Rest hides more than a severed head. Eight Sand. '''

Good luck,

3301